It was my birthday recently and I have been reflecting on many things of late, well as usual. I started the month with lots of positive energy and enthusiasm for a bright and fruitful year ahead as its proving to be so far. I reviewed the year gone by and what I want to pursue next, really enjoying each moment and day as its passes. Daily gratitude.
On Wednesday I went to see songs of the Wanderers by Cloud Gate Theatre of Taiwan. It was a last minute decision as I was offered free tickets and I had no idea what to expect. For the first 15 minutes I kept thinking, this introduction will soon be over and the music will change pace along with the dance and lighting, but it didn’t. This indeed was the point of the piece. It was a tribute to pilgrimage and influences by Herman Hesse’s Siddhartha, a book I read about a year ago about the buddha’s spiritual journey of self discovery. By the end of the 90 minute performance I felt relaxed, humbled and curious to discuss its meaning and purpose with my friends. It encouraged me to be present and in the moment, to feel content, peaceful and at ease in my skin and in my being. How timely.
I am not the only one spending time online, seeing information, articles, expert voices, TED Talks, quotes and inspiring messages day in and day out. We live in an information age constantly being bombarded with inspiration and ideas to gain success, health, happiness, money, fulfilment and progression. Its overwhelming. I love TED Talks and innovative new ways of thinking, working and challenging questions and solutions. But sometimes it is all too much.
There are increasingly books and businesses helping us to move forward, make money, have experiences, travel, sex, love, relationships, trim bodies, big homes; you name it. Constantly we are tempted to reach out for what supposedly we do not already have. At the same time I see messages because of what I am following about self love, spirituality, being kind and humble, feeling and giving love. I love these spiritual messages the most.
In the end life is like an experiment, a gameshow, a play with different actors, winners and losers, coming and going. No one is really in control, or knows the secret, the best path to follow, the right decisions. I’ve had some amazing highs so far and I’m enjoying this period where I decide on the next chapter and how I want to move forward next. Its a busy time as always for me always researching, growing and doing different things, but in parts its also slow and peaceful when I let it be. It’s not easy and its interesting how much other people try to come into your path and disrupt it, showing how much they are not in control of their own, or maybe deep down they really just want to help.
Being busy, stressed and working super hard around the clock is somehow cool and means you are successful and making it. No thanks, that is not my dream life even though I have been there many times. True for some professions, goals and careers this is a must and can lead to fruitful results, but it is not the only way or the best way for us all. We don’t all want this lifestyle and at least not all the time. Money is the one thing that has everyone salivating and slaving away for, its like the gold band that Golem in Lord of the Rings is obsessed with and drawn to. Of course we need to pay the bills, eat and buy things that make us look and feel good. But often it just goes to far.
Life is in chapters, we learn and grow constantly and its a beautiful thing. I have slowed down some things, stopped and started others and it feels good. Its my journey and up to me to shape how it goes as much as I am able, without feeling too pressured into decisions by society’s expectations. I’m usually like this on the road; backpacking and contemplating life, meeting new people and thinking about things. Some people think that those who wander are lost, I don’t agree. Now I’m a wanderer in my own home town and its quite exciting. I did not think I could do this but I am choosing who to have in my path and new people enter all the time whilst I continue to find my way. I don’t need to travel on planes and trains to get my kicks all the time, they are right here at home if I seek them out, or indeed if I just be, slow down and relax. Then they fall right into my lap. If you haven’t already go and read some Herman Hesse. Oh and go and see some contemporary dance, its liberating.